How Time Gets Away

I've got my feet up, having quiet time before bed, everyone else is asleep and I realize how blessed I am. I realize I don't need for anything and there are few things left that I really want. Oh sure, I want a new car, new washer/dryer, refrigerator, new kitchen actually, but I don't really need them. I've got a roof over my head, a warm bed to sleep in, plenty of food to eat (more than I need), clothes on my back and in my closet, a man I love and who loves me, five wonderful children (spouses included of course), and six exceptional grandchildren, good friends, good health, and lots of memories. There is so much more. I could go on and on.

So what is the problem? I am reminded of the thirty years or so that we spent raising our five. What would I have done differently. The answer, a lot of things. I would have spent more time on the floor with them. I would have laughed more, played more, cleaned house less, been less concerned about being too perfect or raising perfect children. I would have gone to the beach more often (they loved the beach and so did I), had more "tea parties", played ball, pulled wagons, colored, sang, danced, screamed much less, said "I love you" more often, made mud pies, watched balloons fly, see pictures in the clouds, searched for 4-leaf clovers, blow bubbles, fly more kites, swing higher, and hugged more often. I'd like to slow time so I can relish the moment, live in the present, not always looking forward to tomorrow, the next day, next year, or the next. That's what I would do different.

With grandchildren, I now have the opportunity to do those things. And yet, I still find myself doing my busy things first, then doing the fun things. It is so engrained in me I really have to work hard to fulfill this desire. I have a hard time with it. Thank goodness my children are not doing the same things. I watch with envy as they play games and act silly with them. They learned that from their father for sure.

I realized on this last birthday that a year flies by much faster than ever. My days are faster, one day it's Monday then the next is Friday. The weekends are so fast and the weeks turn in to fast months. Before I know it, Christmas is here again. Just think, it seemed like yesterday that we were so concerned about Y2K. Now we are looking at 2010. I'd love to hold it back for a little while but I know I can't. So my job is to enjoy every moment I'm allowed, to know what is more important in my life, and to be in the moment. Easier said than done. But nothing worthwhile comes easy. The rewards are greater when we have to work harder for them.