Friday, October 30, 2009

How Time Gets Away

I've got my feet up, having quiet time before bed, everyone else is asleep and I realize how blessed I am. I realize I don't need for anything and there are few things left that I really want. Oh sure, I want a new car, new washer/dryer, refrigerator, new kitchen actually, but I don't really need them. I've got a roof over my head, a warm bed to sleep in, plenty of food to eat (more than I need), clothes on my back and in my closet, a man I love and who loves me, five wonderful children (spouses included of course), and six exceptional grandchildren, good friends, good health, and lots of memories. There is so much more. I could go on and on.

So what is the problem? I am reminded of the thirty years or so that we spent raising our five. What would I have done differently. The answer, a lot of things. I would have spent more time on the floor with them. I would have laughed more, played more, cleaned house less, been less concerned about being too perfect or raising perfect children. I would have gone to the beach more often (they loved the beach and so did I), had more "tea parties", played ball, pulled wagons, colored, sang, danced, screamed much less, said "I love you" more often, made mud pies, watched balloons fly, see pictures in the clouds, searched for 4-leaf clovers, blow bubbles, fly more kites, swing higher, and hugged more often. I'd like to slow time so I can relish the moment, live in the present, not always looking forward to tomorrow, the next day, next year, or the next. That's what I would do different.

With grandchildren, I now have the opportunity to do those things. And yet, I still find myself doing my busy things first, then doing the fun things. It is so engrained in me I really have to work hard to fulfill this desire. I have a hard time with it. Thank goodness my children are not doing the same things. I watch with envy as they play games and act silly with them. They learned that from their father for sure.

I realized on this last birthday that a year flies by much faster than ever. My days are faster, one day it's Monday then the next is Friday. The weekends are so fast and the weeks turn in to fast months. Before I know it, Christmas is here again. Just think, it seemed like yesterday that we were so concerned about Y2K. Now we are looking at 2010. I'd love to hold it back for a little while but I know I can't. So my job is to enjoy every moment I'm allowed, to know what is more important in my life, and to be in the moment. Easier said than done. But nothing worthwhile comes easy. The rewards are greater when we have to work harder for them.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Children

When children are little we have such dreams for them. Little do we know about what the future holds. As parents, we hope they will grow up to be the adults we can be proud of. And in this, we have not been disappointed. Our children are good, strong, diverse, opinionated, kind, loving and adults that we are very proud of.

Their diversity, however, can add to my already graying hair. I have always tried to stay out of their discussions ( I refuse to call them arguments), although, it sometimes takes me back 30 years or more when I would worry that they would never be friends and would hate each other forever. In their adulthood, we have made it a practice to not discuss politics or religion since we don’t always agree and it can become somewhat volatile.

Since the advent of e-mail, IMs, blogs, FB, tweets, and none personal discussion groups we no longer have face to face discussions and we sometimes fail to see beyond the written word. That’s not all there is to communicating. There are no facial expressions, body language, voice inflections, eye contact or gentleness. It’s all been reduced to black and white with a few emoticons. The written word cannot replace real people and real voices. I believe it has had a detrimental effect on our relationships with each other.

Over recent months I have had occasion to read the back and forth comments on FB between several of our children. It’s fun to read their banter back and forth, but sometimes things get a little heated. And sometimes it gets a little too personal. At least, that’s the take I have on it. I tried for the longest time to let it go. It’s not my business. As young children, when they would have very heated arguments and act as children do, I could end up making things worse if I tried to interfere. And I often did. Parents have to walk a very fine line between knowing when to keep our hands off and when it’s time to break things up. To break things up I would often just tell them to go to their rooms and stay there until they could apologize to each other. And I would do this in a very loud voice.

One of the things I really look forward to is our family gatherings whenever we can arrange them. I just love having our growing family together. We’ve always had such a great time. And I’ve always been so proud of them because of their ease of being with each other and love for one another. I hope that never changes, because, after all, what is important is family, not who can out argue the other. Sure, we all have our own opinions about things and so what if we don’t all think alike. If we did, it would be a very boring life and we would accomplish nothing. We didn’t raise our children to be mirror images of us or each other.

I can only hope that this next family gathering will be even better than the others since everyone plans to be there. Our Thanksgiving meal will be both traditional and non-traditional since we do have such a diverse family. The important thing is that we all be together and have a good time. I love you guys.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Cruise Crazy

I know it's been a really long time since I've written anything. I've just really been a "busy little woman". However, I've got to tell you about our cruise.
It was awesome. Probably, the most relaxing time we've had in a long time. Our stops were: St. Maarten, San Juan, and Labadee.
Our flight to Miami left from Lubbock at 5AM on Saturday, Aug. 15. Tom and Kathy drove us to Lubbock at 2AM. Flight got to Miami just fine - that was my biggest concern. We sailed at 4:30PM and sailed for 2 days.
The ship activities were so varied and so many that we spent those 2 days just relaxing and visiting all the activities. There were, at least 3 swimming pools and 5 jacuzzis, a rock climing wall (no, I didn't try it) a flow rider (that's like surfing on boogie boards - I didn't try that, either. Didn't want to be laughed at so I watched and laughed), a casino, of course, a water zone for kids that had all the sprays, buckets that filled and tipped, spray guns, climbing stuff, etc.

Our ship was “Liberty of the Seas”. This is the largest cruise ship on the water at this time. Once the Oasis of the Seas is launched, it will be the largest. Liberty’s capacity is 4,400 passengers and 1,400 crew. I think it was fully occupied. Oasis will be about 5,400 passengers and more crew. Of the fellow passengers we met, many had been on this ship previously and said they preferred this cruise line and this ship to any other.
The Royal Promenade had shops, cafes, artists, vendors galore, and always, sales everyday. Every evening there were shows.
We went to the Ice Show (they had a real ice rink where guests could ice skate), a variety show, an audience scavenger hunt (called Quest) and much more.

During the trip, we again, tried our luck at Bingo to win another cruise. No, we didn’t win it. A guy, who was also on the cruise won in a bingo game, won this one. I thought, for some reason I don’t know, we were unique on this cruise. Guess what? Several other guests were on their “won” cruise. And, they were all trying to win another one.

Anyway, I digress.
After sailing 2 days our first stop was Tuesday in St. Maarten.
There were many things to do, but we just decided to walk around the town a bit, do a little window shopping and picked up a few "freebies". Before returning to the ship we looked for a place to eat, and because it was so very warm and humid (you know how we don’t like humidity), we ended up in an air conditioned BURGER KING! No comment.
There are 2 sections to St. Maarten, the Dutch and the French. We were on the Dutch side, but some guests went to the beach on the French side. They said it was beautiful (and they had nude bathing on that side  ).

Our next stop, Wednesday, San Juan.
This is the capitol of Puerto Rico. We toured the “old and new” San Juan. We stopped at the capitol building
and the San Cristobal Fortress,
drove down very narrow brick paved streets, and viewed the old buildings in the area.

Thursday was our last stop. Labadee is an Island resort developed by Royal Caribbean. Our day consisted of relaxing on the beach, and an outdoor feast provided by the staff on the ship. We toured only part of the resort and spent most of the time on a lounge under the trees by the water.
Wow! I could (should) do that more often.
The resort had water activities like a water park with ice bergs to climb and jump into the water, water trampolines, a huge water slide,
jet ski tours, a zip line across the water,
and, of course, the shopping ( we didn’t even go there).
It was a fab day!

Friday we sailed all day and docked back in Miami at 7am Sat. Our flight home was uneventful and we arrived in Lubbock where Tom and Kathy and Marcello were waiting. It was a perfect weeks vacation.

Back in the “real world” again for the last week and my “relaxed” mode is still working.

Monday, July 13, 2009

“METEOR”, A MADE FOR TV MOVIE ON NBC.

What is it with the networks? Did anyone watch this insane movie? I enjoy a disaster movie as much as anyone. I enjoy the suspense, the special effects, and usually the acting. But this?! I just wasted 2 hours watching the worst movie I’ve seen since the last one! And, it’s to be continued next Sunday night. Will I watch it? Who knows? I do have some short term memory so I may forget how dumb this whole thing was and how much time I wasted watching it.

The story line: A meteor and asteroid collided in space, causing the meteor to change it’s trajectory and head towards earth on a collision course that would destroy the earth. In the meantime, the fired scientist, who had the coordinates, and his assistant were heading back to the states from Mexico, when he was hit and killed by a hit and run driver. (BTW, they were the only ones who know exactly where this meteor is going to hit). She hitched a ride from a Mexican truck driver in hopes of crossing the border. He decided not to drive her to LA, so she stopped at a Tijuana police station where she comes upon a murdered policia, was in the process of almost being raped, ended up killing the rapist/murderer and his buddy, stole a police car and drove to the border where she was stopped, taken in to custody and she finally talked the officer into letting her call the center tracing and trying to shoot down the meteor. Then the VP (that would be the VP of the US) calls and says they need her at the center so would the officer please drive her there asap. While they were on the road, in a tunnel, an asteroid hits in front of them on the other side of the tunnel and hits a tanker truck, and the driver of the truck comes into the tunnel right at them. The officer backs up with screeching tires, gets out and spins around before being hit and knocked over an embankment and rolls. As yet, don’t know what happened to the officer and the assistant scientist. She had just discovered that the meteor the first missile destroyed after her first coordinates were given was the smallest of two giant meteors and the bigger one was on the way. (The collision divided the meteor in two. Something we didn’t know before this).

In the meantime, a fugitive was after a cop’s daughter to kill her in revenge for the loss of his family. He grabs a ride with a “fluzzy”, to get to the college where the cop’s daughter goes to school, eventually kills the “fluzzy”, takes her car and gets to the college. He tells the room mate he has to find the girl because her dad is his partner. He then kills a cop, takes his motorcycle and gets to the cabin where the girl is staying. (how she got there with 2 other girls is a whole other story). The dad gets there in time to see her held at gunpoint ready to be shot.

In the meantime, a rancher and his wife and son were in their ranch house when an asteroid hit in their field and almost destroyed their house and kill them all. But, they survived, and Michael (their 13 yr old son) went off to school and mom went to work at the hospital. She’s a doctor. An asteroid hit the bus Michael was on, turned it over, many children were killed – of course Michael was only injured – and they were taken to mom’s hospital where she, of course, saw her injured son while she was working, and she had to continue caring for the more seriously injured. Then, the hospital was hit by an asteroid and though the hospital was completely full, we don’t know what happened to all the patients. But she had to run back in to find Michael. All the while, dad was racing to the hospital in his slow truck, made it just in time to see the fire in the hospital and ran in to find his wife and son.

While all this was happening, the chief of police of this small town is trying to calm the panicked residents of the town while they are making a rush on the grocery store to stock up on supplies. The local bully in town is going to use his rifle to protect himself. The cop is trying to peacefully get everyone in to the fall out shelter and is confronted by the bully saying “no one pushes him around like that”. Cop talks him into putting his gun down and bully says “OK, what can I do to help?”

Now, aren’t we all so wrapped up in this story that we can’t afford to miss the next installment! If I watch this conclusion of the movie, somebody, please, put me out of my misery. Put a bag over my head!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

JURY DUTY

I have not been called to jury duty very often, probably no more than half a dozen times. The only jury I served on was in municipal court in Potter County. The case was heard for an elderly (maybe in his 70’s) who asked for a jury trial for a ticket he received for not wearing his seat belt. GUILTY!!

The only other time I even got close to being chosen as a juror was for a child molestation case. My thinking is that I wasn’t chosen due to my being a mom and grandmom. But, they kept us there from 8am to 6pm. That was a long $6 day.

This time it was very different. This time out of almost 300 called, I was “chosen” to be a juror for a civil trial they claimed would take 2 to 3 days. Famous last words. We were there all week! The plaintiffs were suing State Farm for failing to pay for all the damages from a 2005 hail storm. I’ve been in a few hail storms and we had 2 new roofs within 5 years due to hail storms. The plaintiffs were claiming damage to their ceilings and walls inside their home and on their front and back porches. The porch ceilings were of masonite, the type that over the years has had some rather large claims due to their inferior products. Honestly, the hail was the biggest I’ve ever seen. The video showed stones as big as large grapefruits. Several actually broke through the decking on the roof. State Farm replaced both roof and decking. No problem there.

The rest of the damage, State Farm claimed, mostly due to normal aging or poor construction. We listened to 3 1/2 hours of video deposition, plus 4 more days of testimony from witnesses and “experts”, ad infinitum. Much of it was hashed over and over and over, with the lawyers asking the same question 20 times just to get the answer they wanted. Just like on Law & Order!

Our judge is probably the nicest guy on the bench in Randall County. We recessed at least every hour for one thing or another. And we always broke for 40 to 45 minutes for lunch and were released by 5 every day. But, the county didn’t spring for our lunches. After all, we were receiving $40/day so we surely could afford it. Guess what, I’m keeping the $166 I get for the week.

All in all, it was a great experience. We found for the plaintiff, but not for everything. They were asking for $18,000 for repairs remaining on the house and $12,220 for the cost of the engineer they hired on their own to review State Farms findings and make his own recommendations. We awarded them $7,000 for the repairs which is what it would have cost them for the remaining repairs in 2005, and $6,000 for their engineer since his original cost was more like $2000 until he added on the costs of litigation. I found out later that State Farm was willing to settle the whole thing for $25,000. I guess the plaintiffs weren’t very happy with the verdict. The finding for the plaintiff was not unanimous but we only had to have 10 of 12 votes. By the way, today they are still insured with State Farm.

I learned more than I ever wanted to know about insurance adjustors, estimates, et all. It wouldn’t have been such a long week except that every night after court recessed, I went to the office and worked another 2 to 3 hours. I’d come home and literally collapse and fall asleep in minutes. All the while, thinking about Kathy, Tom, and Marcello arriving here the next Monday.

If you ever have a chance, I think the experience is worth the effort. However, had I been considered for jury in the molester trial and been asked questions by the lawyers, I would have said “hang him high and hang him low - hang him by his thumbs and his ever lovin balls”.
See, they would have quickly let me go.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mother's Day

As I reflect on this Mother’s Day, I think about my mom and Glen’s mom and even though they are no longer with us, we wish them a very happy Mother’s Day and thank them for being who they were and what they did. I talk with them frequently, asking their advice and trying to think of what they would do in any given situation.

Today I wish a very happy Mother’s Day to all mothers in this world, be you a single mom, divorced mom, step mom, traditional or non-traditional mom, adoptive mom, working mom, stay at home mom, old mom, new mom, young mom, house mom (thanks Mrs. Haviz), and grandmom. You are special and I give each of you a rose that will last as long as you wish.

MOTHERS RULE! Without mothers where in the world would we be? We were given the special and unique privilege of participating in the miracle of life. (Thank you, God!). (Guys, I’m not leaving you out. After all, we know that we couldn’t do it without you). We are the baby factories. It is our bodies that protects and nurtures these little humans for the first 9 months of their development. Along with our Maker (and with more than a little help from our man), we produce the men and women of this world and, with our mothering, produce the philosophers, teachers, doctors, nurses, factory workers, CEO’s, inventors, presidents, leaders of all kinds, astronauts, more mothers and fathers, on and on. The list would be endless. Pat yourselves on the back, moms. We are the VIP’s of this world.

Everywhere I look I see young mothers with their beautiful children (yes, all children are beautiful) and I reflect on the years when our children were young. I want to rush to every mother’s side and tell them “enjoy and relish every moment of your children. Don’t let time slip away because before long they will be out of your arms and out on their own doing whatever they do and, as Glen so often says, ‘scaring the hell out of us’.” Time will slip away, years will go by, and you are separated by time and space. Stay connected however you can. Take the time to call, write, twitter, or whatever, to be and remain a part of their lives and you a part of theirs.

Computers and web browsers (skype) are great, cell phones, even better. Reading our children’s blogs is like listening in on their conversations and being with them even though they are miles (make that thousands of miles or across oceans) away. Technology can be cumbersome and frustrating for us “mature” adults, but it’s worth every stressful moment. I can write this as we are travelling back to Amarillo from Austin, even with a restrictive brace on my wrist and the road ruts making the ride all but smooth in our big SUV. We spent a great morning with Kristi, Sarah and Stephen for a scrumptious Mothers Day Brunch at the South Congress Restaurant. (That’s the name of the restaurant on South Congress ). We spent time talking about our next visit (the one in San Antonio for Thanksgiving), giving and receiving lots of hugs and most importantly, lots of “I love yous”. I’ve received calls already from Jen & Dave and Kathy & Tom and it’s not even noon. I know Mark and Sean’s are forthcoming. (Upon arriving home there was a message and card waiting for me) It’s almost like being together.

I’m reflecting on our children’s propensity for living and what exceptional people they are. Often I think I had nothing to do with their development, but Glen reminds me that is not the case. I wonder how much of it is by chance. What about those that choose lifestyles that are not in line with our values? Is there a force, be it God or your personal Higher Power, that guides you to the path you take or is it predestined as some may think? Personally, I think it’s more to do with the free will that we are given. And, with that, the freedom to choose the path where our talents may lead . Do these talents, or gifts, come to us through a gene pool or just through plain hard work? Even if they come from the gene pool, there is still much hard work involved. We can choose to follow or not. Every time I watch a professional tennis match, or listen to beautiful music, I think, “could that have been me? Could I have done that?” After all, I had the opportunity to study music and I loved it. I could have picked up the tennis racquet at a young age instead of waiting until I was 37. Did I put aside a talent I should have developed to, instead, pursue a profession I had envisioned in the nursing field, and then marry and raise a family? Somehow I think not. Every time I look at my children, listen to them, read their blogs, learn more about them, I thank God for giving me this wonderful opportunity to be their mother.

My children challenge me daily and have taught me more than I could ever have hoped to teach them. They have taught me tolerance and patience. They’ve taught me how to laugh at their silly jokes, and that it’s alright to cry when I’m happy. They have shown me that it’s OK to be different and that they are strong. They have taught me that I shouldn’t worry about them, that they can take care of themselves. Most of all, they taught me about unconditional love.

Thank you, Mark, Kathy, Kristi, Jennifer, and Sarah, for all the joy you bring to my life and to your dads. If I had it to do all over again, there would still be Mark, Kathy, Kristi, Jennifer and Sarah. And “5isenuf” still holds a lot of truth!!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

American Flight Fiasco

Our visit to Kathy and Tom’s was great – once we arrived. Have I ever mentioned how much I dislike, actually hate, American Airlines?

To begin with, on Friday, 1 hour before we were to leave for the airport, the airlines called and informed us that the flight had been cancelled. Well, somehow I was not ready to believe them. (I’d had previous bad experience with them and they didn’t even rebook us that time). This time they at least rebooked us on a flight leaving at 6am the next day. That would be Saturday, 4/18. I called Rick Husband airport to see if, in fact, it had been cancelled due to weather. Well, yes it had. When I gave her my flight number she first said there was no flight with that number scheduled. I said “look again”. “Oh yes, here it is”. “That flight’s been cancelled. Bad weather in Dallas.” The last time this happened we were supposed to be on our way to Europe, meeting up with the rest of the group in Wisconsin. We ended up driving to OKC to catch a TWA flight – that cost $700 per person. Would American book us on a flight? No!! Anyway, that’s another story.

Needless to say, I was very frustrated, but as it turned out, it worked out better as I got a few things done that absolutely needed doing and wouldn’t have been done had we left that Friday.

Saturday morning we flew out of Amarillo, on time, no problems. It was a different story once we got to Dallas. The new terminal at DFW is pretty nice. It’s fairly easy to get around in, with lots of shopping and a few restaurants/fast food places but nothing to write home about. I was able get our seat assignments and check in the night before so there was not a problem there. However, it seemed we didn’t have a crew for the plane. Dah! They were flying in from Austin and arrived about an hour after we were to lift off. So what’s new?!

After boarding, which seemed to take forever, we pushed back from the gate. Then, all the lights went out, along with the air, and the engines. The electrical problems and engine start up couldn’t be done sitting away from the gate so we were pulled back to the gate where we sat for another hour. We were eventually moved off the plane to await who knows what – another aircraft for all the passengers or rebooking on many different flights, though I can’t say that I minded getting on a different aircraft. I’d rather have a different plane that didn’t have to be fixed on the runway while we waited. Another hour passed, and we were given $5 vouchers for a meal which, by the way, we had to obtain at a restaurant. Now, what restaurant in an airport sells a meal for $5? We had already purchased a sandwich when we originally got off the plane so it wasn’t like I was starving. I did stand in line at a restaurant, only to be the next customer when they called our flight to board. I gave away our 2 vouchers to someone in line and hurried back to the gate.

We arrived in Ft Lauderdale over 4 hours later than scheduled. The visit was going to be short enough but now would be even shorter.


This trip was originally going to be our Caribbean Cruise but due to business conflicts we had to postpone again! After the flight fiasco, I’m glad we didn’t plan to cruise. Many passengers were trying to get to the docks to board their ships on time. It could be pretty frustrating.

We had a very good visit with Kathy and Tom and Marcello. Kelsey and Cassandra were little whirlwinds and we didn’t see much of them. Cassandra has a boyfriend and spends much of her time with him or her girlfriends. Kelsey is 18 and has a life of her own. (How did they grow up so fast!). Monday, while Kathy was at work, we went to the park and Marcello completely wore us out. The parks in Coconut Creek are beautifully manicured and well kept. Other places could learn some lessons from them.

The evening before we left, Marcello kept saying he didn’t want Nana and Grandpa to go. How good did that make us feel?

We woke up to storm clouds the morning we were to leave for home. Not bad, and they desperately need the rain, though probably not as much as we do in Amarillo, but it was welcome rain. The flight was going to be on time so no worries. Except that I was not able to get seat assignments for us online. When we checked in we were told our seats would be assigned at the gate. So much for that! The flight was way oversold. Now, I don’t know about anyone else, but you would think that since we only booked the flight on Wednesday of last week, we would have been told that it was oversold WHEN WE BOOKED THE FLIGHT!! Thankfully, enough people accepted the airlines offer of a $300 voucher so we got seats.

We arrived home and in no time, felt like we hadn’t been away at all. So, today, we receive e-mails from American Airlines apologizing for the long delay on Saturday, and awarding each of us 4000 AA Advantage miles. I may think twice before sending the letter of complaint I had composed. If they read it, they may take the miles back (along with our other "many" accumulated miles).